Musings of Marriage

While dreaming up a shaky future, knowing that I am pushing myself in the direction I am without expecting every detailed outcome to resolve, I realize that I am not stable in securing myself a career. I just haven’t gotten enough taste of my aspiration to know what I fully want to commit to.

However, I do want to be married. And right now, I am leagues from being qualified for marriage.

This is okay though. Marriage, like many other duties (for a lack of better word), requires training. And it is a sad, sad fact that many people feel they are destined to be single because they limit their heart by letting their thoughts rule them out as imperfect, never-ready, overbearing, and not-the-type.

This is simply false; marriage requires training.

Will a determined soldier enter a battlefield without knowing how to man his weapon? He could, but it would be logically wise if he had some input on how to employ tactics, treat his gun, and learn the heavy responsibilities and loyalty that comes with fighting in a combat unit.

Much the same is a man committing to a woman in deducing all of her needs and dreams; respecting her as a person, and her, him.

A marriage will always require necessary compromise, but if that compromise creates in a person a false, miserable and partial charade, then the relationship is not healthy.

Being a single man, it is hard to know what my future wife will require. I want to commit to her, so I must teach myself patience. I want to be faithful to my wife, so I must discipline myself. I want to be a rock for my wife, so I must teach myself humility with confidence.

Everything else will fall into place once we meet, I have faith. This is only a recent impression that has kept me thinking vigorously.

Laila Tov

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